At the root of Paul’s impossible asks of us is a desire that we put away our masks, tear down our walls, and empty ourselves of all apprehensions, pretensions, and selfish intentions.

Not all at once, forevermore, but as we can, as we go and with God’s help.

Because imitation is a lifelong pursuit; as Baldwin suggests, a tough and universal sense of quest and daring and growth, but one that is made for us and worth everything.

Are you hungry? Am I? What are we hungry for? When was the last time we were blessedly, contentedly full? Was there a time? Can you remember? In what ways do we seek to quell our hunger? In what ways do we seek to ignore it?

And even if we recognize our hunger, allow ourselves to go there, to remember it, and to feel it, what then?

Where to get bread?

God is in the business of multiplication, not division. When Jesus takes our lives and blesses them, the blessings grow and grow and grow. Our lives become more than they were, God’s abundance lives in us so that we can share that abundance with others. Our life becomes one of those barley loaves that feeds others. Our life becomes the bread that is shared. As we seek peace, as we work for justice, as we practice compassion, as we love people who are difficult to love.

This week’s Gospel is a study in both the necessity of rest and the promise inherent in Holy desperation.

Rest. And Holy Desperation. Perhaps these seem a strange pairing, and yet they have much in common.

We begin in baptism and then travel through this life, waiting and searching for clarity that may never come, yet we still find comfort and hope in our faith.

Baptism then, is not anywhere near the end of our journey. It’s a place much closer to the beginning. As it was with Jesus. After he was baptized, his ministry grew, He taught, he healed, he preached, he loved.

It wasn’t an end; it was a beginning.

Where do we go when we have nowhere else to go? When the bottom falls out, when all is lost. When a relationship suddenly dissolves. When we get a scary diagnosis. When a building crumbles. Where do we turn?

That is the question at the very heart of our faith.